coping, death, growing old, losing battles, memories, moments, old dogs new tricks, photography, solitude

Resting places…

This post came up on my Facebook memories from June 2nd 2 years ago.  I was surprised to read it and realize that I was getting the urge to get out of my comfort zone that long ago.  June 1, 2019 is the day I hitched up the trailer for the first time and headed to New Hampshire to learn the ropes of camping.  I’m feeling paralyzed this year, afraid of being on the road and finding no spaces in campgrounds, or campgrounds not open.  It would be so much easier to stay home…

Duxbury Beach in Massachusetts features prominently in my fond memories of home.  Maybe it was that we used to stay at my uncle’s cottage, the last one on the seawall that defined the private beach from the public beach.  That it was rocky, especially after a storm, was a plus.  You could put your blanket out on the sand and scout out a few rocks to anchor down the corners.  My husband had heard me rave about it long before he ever saw it, and when I took him there it was after a storm and it was particularly rocky, and from the look in his eye I’m pretty sure he doubted my sanity after that.  Since then I have been to lovely beaches with expanses of sugar sand as far as the eye can see, but I will never feel about them the way I feel about Duxbury.  Which is why I told Charley that I wanted my ashes scattered at Duxbury when the time came.  My daughter heard that and said that I should be informing her of my wishes, and, as usual, she was right.  If I was ever going to change my mind about that then visiting a cemetery like this one is why I’ll let the decision stand.  Stones sinking into the ground, names and dates barely readable, and no one to care or remember.  Sadly, there was more than one ‘unknown’ marker.  A person, a life.  Someone’s child, possibly someone’s parent, gone except for that sad marker.  After being home alone for so long I’m finding that part of me now wants to get out, hit the road, go everywhere, see everything. But I tell myself I’m too old, I can’t do it alone.  Maybe so, maybe not.  But I like the idea that one day my ashes might ride the wind and the water, and travel farther than my dreams can take me now.  I’ll return to Duxbury one day…5-28cemeteryfence


5 thoughts on “Resting places…”

  1. Found memories for me too! Those old cemeteries are memories of the past and it is sad to see them in shambles but except for my immediate family I couldn’t tell you where my ancestors were buried! Dates in the stones tell you lots.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I truly understand and share your feelings for Duxbury Beach and would like to go there together someday when we can enjoy it’s infinite beauty while walking on the rocky beach!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Fond memories for me too. A get together when Heather was a baby. If my memory serves me right I remember the warm puddles furing low tide. Sand castles. and even jelly fish. And years later the story yoi told me of Dawn staying with you folks, even during a t-storm. A favorite photo of you, Dawn and Barney walking Duxbury beach. I did visit many years ago and would love to return to see the cottage now. Not small anymore.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.