When I was newly divorced, give or take 40 years ago, I drove my ex-husband and his then girlfriend now wife, crazy. I called him. A lot. No, not to fix a plumbing leak or anything. I called because I found the day-to-day responsibility of raising the kids to be a bit overwhelming. We were a Navy family, living far away from all family, and having few friends. No one else knew my kids well besides him. And what if I dropped dead? He would have to take the kids on immediately and I wanted him to know where they were ‘at’. I needed to feel that he was up to speed with them. So when an issue had come up and I had handled it I would call him, tell him what had happened and how I had handled it, and he would always tell me I had handled it just right and he wouldn’t have changed anything. If a divorce can be a good thing then we had a good divorce. I needed validation.
Which all came to mind this morning when my soft-boiled eggs turned out perfectly. I must still be seeking validation because I get quite pleased with myself when that happens, and I feel like the universe has given me a little pat on the back. And then I won my very first game of solitaire this morning. I have a solitaire-playing friend who suggested that my shuffling skills aren’t the greatest, but I choose to be encouraged that my life-changes that are underway have me on the right track. In spades! I’ll take validation any way I can get it.
A Snowbird's Life Through the Lens 